


A Stitch in time....

by Nnk



Category: 13 Reasons Why (TV)
Genre: M/M, mentions of suicide and attempted suicide
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-05-20
Updated: 2018-09-04
Packaged: 2018-11-03 01:01:43
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,727
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10956423
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nnk/pseuds/Nnk
Summary: My take on the ending of the show but with a twist and whole new story line. Like the saying goes a stitch in time saves nine, meaning some work before a major event can save more work after. Read to find out the rest.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> So the first chapter is short, cause I am getting a feel for how the reception for this piece will be. Thus please leave a comment if you liked it or didn't and why. I'll probably update in a week or so if you prefer to see more of the work before judging it.

A knock. That’s what started this other whirlwind of a story. Or maybe it started from my first talk with you about the tapes, I don't really know. What I do know is that me knocking on your door that day was a decision I would never take back, ever. 

“What are you doing here Jensen?” you asked me when I showed up at the doorstep of your home. 

“Hey Alex, I wanted to see ….. how you're doing.” Was my response to you. What you didn't know is that was not the first thing I wanted to say to you, cause how else would you be feeling; besides as if your life has been turned upside down. I mean all of our lives had but I couldn't find any better words and my own mental state was shot. 

“I’m fine Jensen, not that it’s any of your business.” You told me in a voice of anger. “Why do you even care anyway? No you know what I don't care so just leave Clay.” You started to close the door after finishing.

“No wait. Stop!” my own voice raised in panic as I watched you. I don't actually know why but something told me that that door closing was going to be another thing in my life that I would be haunted by if I just let it happened. “I really came here cause I just wanted to talk to you. Please can we just go inside and talk?” My voice was shaking as I tried to project a calm front. 

“How did you even find my house Clay? I’ve never told you and you've certainly never asked.” 

“Tony. I was with Tony and asked him if he knew where you lived and if he could take me there.” I had left out the part where Skye and Tony’s boyfriend were with us cause I needed company so that I could clear my head. “So Tony’s here too?” 

“No he left, or rather I asked him to go after dropping me off. So it's just me Alex.” I waited as you turned your head to look around to check if you could see his car and if I was lying. After the second sweep to make sure you didn't miss anything you finally spoke to me again. “Whatever Clay you asked if I was okay, I answered. You've got what you came here for so you can leave” this time you close the door faster and shut it completely. 

I could have given up at that point. It was obvious that you didn't want to talk to me, and I couldn't blame you. I didn't though I just knocked on your door again, rapping my knuckles harder against your front door. You didn't come out at first so I continued till I saw the doorknob turn again. It may have been only a minute or two but in that moment it felt longer. As I pulled away my closed fist I caught a brief glimpse of my reddened knuckle joints.

“What is it Jensen? I already told you I am fine so you can go, scram, leave, buzz of, or any other way you want to say it.” I could see the annoyance in your eyes, hear it in your voice. You wanted me gone and at the time I didn't know why. “I'm not leaving till we talk Alex. A real talk.” 

“You can either leave Clay, or I can call the cops on you. And don't forget that my dad is one so think carefully about what you want to do, especially with that drug thing you have from the school.” At this point most people would have just left. I am really glad that I wasn't my usual self then or that I was most people. “Then you are gonna have to call the cops Standall cause I'm not leaving.”

I was really hoping you were not going to call the cops, while secretly thinking that I was going to go jail for trespassing or loitering or whatever it was I was doing by staying when you said to leave your property. “Why don't you just leave Clay?” The sigh of resignation that follows was like music to my ears. It let me know that you wouldn't be calling the cops. It also let me know that I was getting through to you on some level that I was seriously not going to just leave. “Cause you know what happened the last time…….. I left when someone told me to.” I didn't even try to keep the regret I was feeling from leaking into my voice. I shifted my eyes down looking at my feet in shame. 

“You might as well come in then. Don't want the neighbors talking, especially to my dad about this.” You stepped aside and opened the door wider. My whole body eased a bit, the tension I was feeling at you turning me away fleeing from me. I walked through that door not realising fully what I was walking into, but knowing that I’d do the best damn job I could throughout the whole experience.


	2. Alex's POV

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The title says most of what this chapter is about.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First off a thank you for your time in reading this and hope you enjoy. Also warnings to mentions of suicide in this chapter. There was also a small typo change I caught in the last chapter but nothing major.

A knock. That is what saved my life. Or at least is the first step on a long journey. A knock and a person who, although later than I would have liked looking back on it now, came to me to make sure I was alright. I’ll admit that I wasn’t thrilled to see you at my doorstep. Hell I was downright furious. I mean I had finally had enough, I couldn’t deal with life anymore and was going to end it. But you knocked on my front door and asked me how I was doing, and you really meant it.

It was a stupid question, cause how else could I have been doing with the weeks of internal torment I was going through after hearing Hannah’s tapes. I was at the end of my rope and you show up and ask me how was I doing. I lied of course and told you I was doing fine. I wanted you gone, I didn’t care where. You didn’t know that I was getting ready to end everything, but you didn’t leave. Even when I was short with you and flat out said that my life and well being was none of your business. 

I tried to close the door on you then, hoping you’d give up and go then. I didn’t need you there, or so I thought at the time. You shouted at me to wait though; and a part of me, a very small part, was relieved that you did. When you said you wanted to just talk with me I was both angry and curious. It wasn’t the first time you had tried to talk to me, especially after you heard my tape, but you hadn’t really tried. I for sure didn’t want you to come into the house though. You coming in would mess up everything, at least in my mind it would. So I tried to change the subject. I knew that I hadn’t invited you to my house before so I asked how you found out where I lived. When you told me Tony had dropped you off, and you asked him to leave after doing so, I was skeptical. I looked around, and then looked around again. When I didn’t see his car I reiterated that I was fine and that you could go now that you got your answer. I closed the door faster this time, slamming it in your face in my haste to make sure that you didn’t get me to keep talking to you.

You didn’t give up though Clay, you knocked on my front door again. It was louder this time. I wasn’t sure if it was cause I was just on the other side this time when I heard, or if it was do to you hitting harder. I told myself that you would leave if I didn’t open the door. I was both hoping that to be true and false if that makes any sense to you. I wanted you to go and wanted you to stay, to not give up on me. Humans are such strange creatures like that aren’t we. 

Two minutes of you still knocking though and I gave in. I opened the door and in my anger told you to leave. I was talking down to you acting like you were an idiot for not leaving after the very clear signs that I wasn’t going to talk to you. When you said you wouldn’t leave until we really talked I threatened you with calling the cops. I was surprised that you told me that I was going to have to call the cops to get you to leave. As such I went low, as low as I could to hurt you and get you mad or angry, whatever it took to get you to leave. I asked you why you wouldn’t just leave, we both knew what I was alluding to with that question. Even though I sighed in resignation as I asked it I was privately hoping you’d go. You didn’t. 

The palpable regret that surrounded you hit me. Your eyes looking down at your feet, the pain in them and your voice got to me. I gave in and said “You might as well come in then. Don't want the neighbors talking, especially to my dad about this.” I meant it to. Even though I was letting you in I wasn’t giving up on my goal of ending it all. I rationalized to myself that you’d stay a while and we’d talk, you’d leave when it got late and I would just have to change the date of my final moments of life. You of course didn’t know this as I stepped aside, opened the door wider, and let you in. At least this way no one would be gossiping about my having a fight with a ‘friend’ to my dad. 

I am so grateful to my past self for letting you in. It’s what started the journey to saving me. Our journey.


	3. Why?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alex let’s Clay into his house, read to find out where it goes from there

After letting him into his house Alex lead clay into the living room. It was decorated like most middle class family homes I. The area where. Comfy couches that faced the tv, a wooden table for drinks or food depending on who was using the room and for what reason. Recessed lighting that gave it enough light without making the ceiling seem lower than it actually was. Alex took a seat on the lazyboy recliner that was usually his fathers seat facing the tv, leaving Clay to take a seat wherever he wanted. Clay opted to sit on the couch and faced towards Alex. 

An awkward silence was all that was between the two of them. Alex was still being stubborn and not wanting to even talk to Clay; Clay didn’t have a clue on where to even being the conversation. The silenced stretched between them for a few minutes before Clay and Alex both started to say something. 

“Nice talk Clay” was Alex’s smartass remark. 

“I don’t really know where to start” was Clay’s admission of being lost. 

Both boys looked at each other, Clay blushed in embarrassment and Alex looked away in shame. The silence returned between them. 

Clay took this time to look around more. He noticed that there was an open concept kitchen that was visible from the living room with a bar top counter that people could sit at to eat. An island in the center of the kitchen with stainless steel appliances. On the counter was a bowl of fruits, a blender and coffee machine was visible, a kitchen block full of knives were all neatly visible. The sink faced a window that opened up into a decent sized backyard where a grill was within sight. A picnic table that Clay could barely make out rounded out the simple outdoor space.

Feeling his tongue and throat we’re a bit dry Clay asked Alex “Do you mind if I go get a drink?” 

“Do what you want Clay, glasses are in the cupboard above the sink” was Alex’s response. He still refused to look at Clay, this time a bit from shame rather than just from stubbornness. Clay got up and headed into the kitchen. As he was passing by the island he noticed a folded up piece of paper on it. He knew he shouldn’t but curiosity got the better of him and he reached for it. 

Meanwhile Alex shot up from his seat after realizing what it was the other boy had asked him. He was trying so hard to ignore him that he was only half paying attention to what he said. It wasn’t until Clay got up and walked into the kitchen that Alex realized his mistake. But it was to late, Clay already had the note in his hand and was reading it. 

“Put that down Jensen!!!” Alexis screamed. He was angry at himself for not paying attention and angry at Clay for reading something he shouldn’t have. Clay just stood there frozen. He looked up from the letter to Alex, then back to the letter, and then back to Alex. His face morphing from confusion to disbelief. 

Alex walked over to where Clay was and snatched the piece of paper out of his hands. “Didn’t you parents ever teach you not to fucking touch other people’s shit Jensen! What the fuck do you think this is your house or something!!” The blond screamed in the brunettes face. Alex’s face was red, his expression twisted into rage. He started to curse out Clay with ever expletive that he knew. Part of him was hoping that he’d be able to scare Clay into forgetting what he read if he was confrontational with him. Part of him was distraught over forgetting that the note was there in the first place and allowing Clay to see it. 

The shock of reading the note kept Clay from being able to respond to Alex as he screamed at him. The words he read were playing over and over in his mind as he tried to comprehend what he read. As Alex was hurling his abuse at him Clay finally looked up and asked on a voice that was barely a whisper “What do you mean you could have stopped it?” 

Clay had realized that the note was a suicide note from the first line of apologies Alex had left to his parents. He was apologizing for being weak, for not being the son his dad wanted, for not being able to be like his older brother. He apologized for the action he was going to undertake, for the mess he was leaving behind. He even apologized to Hannah for what he did to her. His last line of the note was ‘I could have stopped it but I didn’t do anything, and for that I’m sorry.’ So Clay asked what he wanted to know the most and looked up into Alex’s face, trying to look him in the eyes. 

Hearing Clay’s question had frozen Alex mid scream. His eyes darted anywhere but meeting Clay’s. His body seemed to deflate as he slinked away from the other boy and used the island to hold himself up. His knees felt weak, his pulsed quickened, his stomach churned in discomfort. Clay had to ask the worst question he could. He had to pick on Alex’s biggest regret. 

For his part Clay could see how uncomfortable his question made Alex. He could read between the lines and knew he hit on something that was very painful to the blond. Clay reaches his hand out to pat the other boys shoulder. To comfort him in some small way, but he hesitated. Clay didn’t know what to do in most social situations, he was awkward around most people or overly polite. But even he knew just touching Alex at this moment wasn’t the brightest idea. So he moved to stand next to the other. He placed his hands on the island and just stood there waiting. He’d let Alex take the next step on where and how this conversation was going to go.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for being so late to update this. Irl stuff happened. I’m glad I took time to get back though cause now I can use things from season two in this story to make it better. Thanks for the reviews and kudos. They mean more than words can express. I should be able to update more often now that I’m in a better place life wise. Also I took some liberties with Alex’s note


End file.
